| 18: Mythology |
[Jan. 14th, 2004|04:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Goo Goo Dolls - Black Balloon | ] |
Today, being bored, I wrote out a mostly-full summary of events (not characters) in Octrin Mythology. It's very rough; not only are the ideas still rather nascent, but my transliteration of Octrin (whose real name is technically now Airula) is totally inconsistent. ;) When I make a site for the language, you will see why.
( Read more... )
And there you are! I'll probably update eventually with descriptions of selected (ie, the more interesting) ages.
--Crackfawx |
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| 17: Novel |
[Nov. 14th, 2003|01:04 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Rammstein - Mütter | ] |
( Chapter 1? )
See, my big problem with writing a novel is that I really want to create a story arc that is (1) all-encompassing (as in, the Octrin mythos), (2) says something deep, (3) is unique, and (4) is long. And good. Or just good. *sigh*
*Does the wishes-he-could-write-dance*
--Crackfawx (who had more rules, but he never posts here anymore. Gah.) |
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| 16: Novel |
[Feb. 25th, 2003|08:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Godspeed You Black Emperor - Sunshine and Gasoline | ] |
Wow. It has been a whole month since I've updated. =/
I have a goord reason for updating today, however. I wrote a (unrevised) prologue for my fantasy novel. Yep. It's fantasy. I decided, and I also went with anthropomorphics, the Oktra being a race of anthro vulpine/lutrine creatures. And thus, somewhere in appearance between foxes and otters.
The Novel has no title yet. Oh well. Enjoy.
( Prologue )
Anyway, is not all that well perfected yet, but I think it's getting there. I really should join that novel-writing community thing Ellen showed me the other day.
*sigh* Writing a lot of work. 2280 words. About 7 or 8 pages in a book, methinks.
--Crackfawx |
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| 15: Translation |
[Jan. 21st, 2003|10:34 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
Struck by the beauty of one scene in the Two Towers, I was inspired today during "class" to translate one of the passages in the movie. The passage is from Elrond's little lecture to Arwen about Aragorn and mortality... Sophie tells me the passage appears in the appendix, about word for word as it is in the movie script. Tolkien is quite difficult to translate. He puts clauses all over the place, it's very messy, if not horribly poetic and pretty. The scene in the movie is so breathtakingly expressive... Aragorn lying dead as his citizens pay their respects... Arwen remaining after all of them have gone and years on years have passed... falling leaves... light filtering through dead trees... Anyway. Finally finished the translation:
Aragorn ma e sendo no kayitise vi, si tariyem amè fura nasa. si Sauron ma kapi narà, si Aragorn ma ampra kayesa narà, o sono tarem emeyuri sim firase vi, tarem çikasis yo vudra no amè lavrithà sa. zafi u kisà hakoà anaqist, Aragorn ma çikansa. en tsana hi galirum arisa... hi galiru ama oryo elodhà tseni no vasrasa. si orim çikan ste atra nasa, virdis ye homnarè amprarè azramis yo eçiyaza, i desu yo itsendi yu hilakrà. mu tareth kè miyum, tarem lakas it stiyur athlasa, çe isifu yo kisarè stara ama raya dze atrarà a. tarem yo nedayis ra matsumà e kodesa, de ayisrarè kadare, yuri o desum nararà sa, yuri tarè itè azkè desoyirem hakatsè irulà sa.
Arwen... tsana hisum e koriye, mirà çikan.
"If Aragorn survives this war, you will still be parted. If Sauron is defeated and Aragorn made king and all that you hope for comes true... you will stil have to taste the bitterness of mortality. Whether by sword or the slow decay of time, Aragorn will die. And there will be no comfort for you. No comfort to ease the pain of his passing. He will come to death. An image of the splendor of kings of men in glory, undimmed before the breaking of the world. But you, my daughter, you will linger on in darkness and in doubt. As the night falling winter has come without a star. Here you will dwell, bound to your grief, under the fading trees, until all the world has changed and the long years of your life are utterly spent.
"Arwen... there is nothing for you here, only death."
I took a bit of liberty with the Octrin grammar, because some of the syntax is messy. A few random notes on pronounciation... /dh/ is voiced /th/, /ç/ is like 'sh' in English, /thl/ is a voiced lateral fricative (which is not entirely easy to explain), grave accents (`) are a simplification of a final /y/. Emphasis falls always on the penultimate syllable unless the ultimate syllable contains a true dipthong (which doesn't happen at all in the text above...). The vowels are somewhere between Japanese and Spanish, less rounded than Spanish.
I think I'll double post this in conlangs for fun. =)
--Crackfawx |
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| 14: Mythology |
[Jan. 8th, 2003|11:09 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Final Fantasy X - Song of Prayer | ] |
In desperate boredom, I decided finally to write some Octrin mythology. It's not all that interesting yet, I don't think, but I'm trying to set it in stone to some degree.
So far I've got a vague idea of where I want it all to head. The most basic concept of the Octrin Religion (which doesn't have a name yet), is that the Universe is divided into 4 separate spiritual planes, perhaps more: Yutsama (the chaotic primordial plane), Aitsama (the divine plane), Sandzama (the real plane), and Nexatsama (the plane of shadow). While this seems a might simplistic, there are specified ways and events leading to connections and obstructions between the planes.
The Universe begins as the originally all encompassing Satsama is split into the Yutsama and the Metsama. The "Mindless Creator" Spirit, known as Sayas dwells in fiery Yutsama, as the shapes of the First Generation of Gods coalesce. The first of the twelve to be born is Saropo, the God of Darkness (not bad darkness, mind you. He's just cool that way). His sister Manda, the Goddess of Justice soon follows.
The interesting thing about Saropo and Manda are that together, they represent not only the manifestation of Sayas' thoughts, but also the actions and intentions of the Creator. These twin gods play an enigmatic role throughout the Mythology, and are no where near as cookie cutter as the other 10 original Gods (as you can see from the detailed list in the LJ cut). As for Sayas, I'm not quite sure what s/he is. But that's not important, and the Aizedji, the Sacred Scripture, pays little heed to Sayas as Sayas. (Probably because he's infinitely complex and stuff, so we wouldn't understand anyway).
Now, the first major event in Metsama is the First Great Battle. This battle between the 3 hatched good gods (Saropo, Manda and Fayan) and 1 evil god (who's a lot more powerful than 1 good god) is provoked by the evil god Nexos destroying one of the eggs before it even hatches. (I am not sure yet what was in the egg, so don't ask). Adding to his crimes, he curses Manda with barrenness (though she does bear one child later through some effort). The three manage to separate Nexos into 8 smaller gods, and banish him to the newly created plane of Nexatsama.
So the rest of the "good gods" are born, the important ones being Saropo, Manda, Fayan (King of Heaven), and Silaru (Goddess of Beauty). Fayan becomes king because Saropo refuses the Crown of Heaven, and so the Order of Aitsama is thus founded. The other 8 gods of Heaven are called the virtues. Cleverly enough, there are 5 gods and 5 goddesses... Fayan eventually unites with both Manda and Silaru, Saropo takes no wife, and the virtues also end up pairing off. There's a bit of backstory to why Fayan takes two wives, which is actually not customary in Octrin Society, which is actually polyandrous. *smile* (Not to mention, a high percentage of Octras are bi/gay, so a woman can have as many female and male lovers as she wants, while males can have 1 female lover and multiple male lovers. *wink*)
Saropo is charged with creating a buffered "De-militarized zone" between Aitsama and Nexatsama. This becomes known as Sandzama, the Plane of Reality. According to the general idea behind the myth, Saropo takes 5 millenia creating the Visible Universe and 5 more creating the star Aira, who becomes his wife. The spirits/gods that inhabit Sandzama all have heavenly bodies "attached" to them (except for Okipo, who will be discussed later... he's cool.) While these are their "sanctuaries," they manifest other places, too. Yeah.
Anyway, that's all for today. A list of Gods I provide for my own remembrance:
( The Octrin Pantheon, A work in progress. )
More to come later. =)
--Crackfawx |
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| 13: Crackfawx's Laws |
[Dec. 2nd, 2002|11:25 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  lazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Deepsky - View From A Stairway | ] |
It's time I came up with more of these. =)
The third Law of Crackfawx is:
The path to inner peace lies with a state of constant appreciation for yourself, other people, your environment, and your experiences.
The fourth Law of Crackfawx is:
Inferiority is entirely relative. As are inferiority complexes.
I had a fifth one, but I can't remember it just now. *shrugs*
--Crackfawx |
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| 12: College Essays |
[Dec. 2nd, 2002|05:55 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | productive | ] |
I've been just a bit occupied with college applications lately, so very little time to update with anything fun and interesting I want to write.
So if you're not too busy, I present to you three essays:
Of course, free feel to skip over a few, or this entire entry entirely, but I would very very much appreciate any feedback you could give me. I beg of you. =)
( Cornell Essay: Meaningful Quote (500 words). )
( UVA Essay: Favorite Word (250 words). )
( Princeton Essay: Meaningful idea, invention, creation (250 words). )
And I so reserve the right to post this in ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8) psifenix, as well, 'cause I like my HTML formatting. =)
Anyways. Sixteen essays to go. *dies*
--Crackfawx |
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| 11: Philosophy, Inspiration |
[Nov. 11th, 2002|10:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | uninspired... sorta | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Kosheen - Hungry (Satoshi Tomiie Vocal) | ] |
Jeremy (best friend since grade 3) and I were talking today, and, to quote something yummily philosophical:
CmdrRoel: I'm sure it'll turn out OK. Everything always does in the end.
Crackfawx: yeah. it's true.
Crackfawx: strange... in't it?
CmdrRoel: Not really.
Crackfawx: not really?
CmdrRoel: You can take the pessimistic, cynical view that in the end, people accept what they have and convince themselves it's the best, so as to fool themselves into enjoying what they've got.
CmdrRoel: But hey...nothing wrong with a little self-fooling.
CmdrRoel: Which is why I know that things will always work out great in the end. =^)
CmdrRoel: Pessimistic reasoning for an optimistic point of view...classic Jeremy philosophy. ;^)
IIt's obvious that delusion plays an important role in happiness, I thnk, anyway. I believe I wrote something along these lines in writing sem, but it didn't come out too coherently. I doubt I'd be coherent now, in this state of sleepy-hyper caffeination. But I thought he made a good point, and I promised I'd quote him on it. So I did. =)
I've been writing really weird fantasy/scifi novel excerpt type things lately. Nothing too coherent. I have no plot, but I like writing. The stuff is probably absolute crap, and without direction, that kinda stuff is just that--crap. But yeah. I think I might expand on one of these. Interestingly enough, this one incorporates some loosely-held Octrin mythology-type-stuff dealing with the apocalypse. It's kind of hard to explain, but suffice it to say that the end of the world in an Octra's eyes involves hermaphrodite gods of destruction.
The excerpt doesn't get that far. And it rambles and shit, but yeah. My mind is weird. It can only think of situations coherently, but events... and plot, forget it. As far as I can tell, this excerpt follows the "prostitute becoming the unlikely messiah figure plus weird freaky dreams and stuff type" pattern thing.
( Excerpt )
</i>
I wish I could write, I wish I could draw... all that. There's such beauty that only needs to be discovered, and sometimes, I get so close I feel I can touch it with my hands, and understand it with my mind, interpret it through words, actions, sound and sight...
And then it slips away like sand.
I need inspiration. That is my fundamental flaw as any kind of artist. I look too hard, or not hard enough for inspiration, and it just eludes me, constantly. At every turn. It only affords me glimpses into what I am capable of.
I dream in music. But it's gone when I wake up.
I'm convinced my mind hates me.
--Crackfawx |
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| 10: College Essay |
[Oct. 31st, 2002|08:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | VNV Nation - Structure | ] |
Well, I don't even know if I'm submitting this one, but I may as well post it. It seems rather dull and trite, so I may just scrap it, unless your opinions direct me otherwise.
The unfortunate destiny of this essay mainly lies in it's archetypicality. It's a form so overused that it's not even funny. But it could be worse, it could be about my grandpa's passing, or a long dictioinary definition. =p
Carnegie Mellon Regular Decision: 2nd Draft
Describe a creative work that has had an influence on you and explain that influence.
My mother had somehow tricked me into auditioning for a fellowship position with a violinist in the National Symphony Orchestra. Needless to say, I was pretty nervous. I've always been pessimistic about auditions, and well, if it was for the NSO, I didn't stand much of a chance. To make the situation even worse, I arrived at the Kennedy Center late, and was forced to share a practice room with a discouragingly talented individual. After tuning to his A, I got out my prepared piece--a quaint little Handel Sonata--while he picked up his violin once more. As cascade upon cascade of notes washed over me, I felt myself falling in love with his piece very quickly.
The first time I heard Praeludium and Allegro, something clicked inside me. And while I didn't get the fellowship, it didn't matter. I had a new goal in sight, a new aspiration. I was obsessed with learning Kreisler's masterpiece. Two Handels and a Bach Violin Concerto later, Mrs. Hudson finally agreed, and I received the hallowed sheet music.
Pulling it out of the brown paper bag, I placed it on the stand, surveying the music. The Praeludium movement was splayed across the first page. This was the part of the piece I could infuse with my soul, my emotions. It was deceptively easy, simple quarter and sixteenth note passages, but it had lots of room for artistic expression, something I had always been good at.
The next two pages would be the greatest challenge I had yet faced as a violinist. The Allegro's passages were so fast and complicated that the pages were almost more black than white.
The never-ending passages were often both capricious and dark, the fleeting arpeggios played across the page, teasing the listener with streams of beautiful descending chord structures and chromatic scales. Honestly, the first time I laid eyes on it, I was terrified. I was just not good enough to play it.
I listened to the recording on the way to school every morning. I practiced more than ever, at least two hours a day. My mother even, surprisingly, stopped nagging me. I usually don't get nervous before performances, but the recital later that spring was an exception. I kept telling myself to be confident, but that just made things worse. I wanted the audience to appreciate Kreisler's work, not mine. I wanted them to be touched by the beauty that had touched me.
Eventually it was my turn to play. I was at the end of the recital, the very last performer. In the end it all went well. There were no false starts, and I didn't mess up too badly--not even on the most difficult part, the cadenza.
After I was done, I received my first standing ovation as a soloist. Smiling I bowed and returned to my seat, satisfied.
No person, no teacher, conductor or judge, inspired me to greater heights than Praeludium and Allegro. And while I'm not considering music as a major, musicianship has made me more self-motivated and respectful of devotion. I realized what an effect the piece had had on me after the recital, while watching Mrs. Hudson's videotape of the concert. I didn't realize it, but my eyes had been closed the entire time I was playing.
Somebody please give me salient points on which to work/edit! I know not what drug I was high on when I decided to write this, but yeah, it's pretty bad. Help me. It burns. And no picky mechanics stuff. I can fix that pretty easily. It's content and form I need to revise.
--Crackfawx |
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| 09: Love |
[Oct. 17th, 2002|05:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Final Fantasy X - Warping to a Different Dimension | ] |
I'm feeling ranty. This isn't related to personal matters, no matter what my loyal readers may believe. Much related, anyway. =)
Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love.
Love, in my experience, is when someone becomes so important that you think about them excessively, to the point that it's distracting. When you're concerned enough that you would drop everything and sacrifice your life so that they can live better. Love... love means you would share your life with someone, give them part of yourself, spend eternity with them, laughing, talking, crying and dancing.
What we feel for people and why we feel for people is complicated.
Some people marry for money, others for looks, a few for love. Commonalities, similar interests, emotional attachments, deep friendships, and even psychological factors thrust us into Love. Some people are scared of dying never having loved. Some people are scared of rejection. Some people avoid love, because they're afraid they're not good enough, or what other people will say or think.
I love. Therefore I am. Amo ergo sum.
Love validates human existence. What are we without our emotions, but automata? Love is the most powerful of any emotion, because it controls so many of our other emotions, becoming the greatest motivation of any other. (Freud be damned.) The most interesting people are those that live for love, live for the day they'll find the One.
The One. I've thought at least three times that I've found the One. Is there more than just one One? Or is the whole bit about the One a bunch of crap? It would make more sense in my vision of the universe that even when you've found the One, you really haven't. There's always a better person for you out there. The doubt is always there... which is why I've given up on the concept. As long as I'm happy and my partner is happy, that's close enough to the One for me. And I wouldn't trade that relationship for one that could be better. The One does not exist. Believe that, and it's true.
I'm not making any sense.
I guess what I meant by all that is that you should never exclude any possibility. (Ooh! First Law...) Be happy with your life, live for love. Even if things aren't perfect, even if the one you love isn't the One you've dreamed of or imagined... as long as you feel you would do anything, give your life to someone, and sacrifice everything, then you're doing marvelously.
What's important is to know when you're in love, to act on your emotions, to have no fears, qualms or trepidations... Love is the most important thing. And yes, once you feel you've found someone you can love for the rest of your eternity, dedicate your life to that person. Think excessively about them, and live for the moments you live with them. Savor all of it. Life is too short for doubts; life is too short to spend alone. Eternity awaits, people. But eternity ain't forever... it's how long you make it to be.
I'll leave you with that vague little comment to ponder. =)
Grant me wings, that I might fly.
--Crackfawx
A note: Any philosophical questions? Anyone? |
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